We have all seen those wedding shows where the couple claims they met in campus and they have never looked back in their relationship. This is more common with our folks when commitment meant something more tangible.
The more recent trend is where hundreds of campus relationships end before the semester, that is, if they ever reach as far as being exclusive. The nature of campus relationships is the here-and-now kind of arrangement and as much as we try, the kind that “May semester do us a part” are here to stay. Some of the reasons being:-
1. Contractual
We see it as a four year contract-so the more we stay in campus, the less significant the relationship becomes. Everything changes when we are done with campus; the geographical location, friends, status, exposure etc. In as much as comrades try to keep the bond, the very nature of life after graduation makes it impossible to be tight. No one wants to graduate with a broken heart. It’s actually easier to look for a new partner wherever fate will land us after graduation without the hustle of long distance relationship.
2. Dilemma of more options
Campus is the one place in life where one will be surrounded by so many options of the opposite gender within the same age bracket. So comrades want to test the waters and try to fish out the best there is. The problem however is that the more the options the harder it is to make up your mind. Having all this options undermines the chance of settling without feeling as if you’re losing on a better alternative out there.
3. Guarded feelings
Most of us swear never to love again once our heart has been broken. We no longer want to engage in soft rock, binge drinking or in a ladies case, eating lots and lots of chocolate to get over someone who might have been taking us for a ride. So in turn, we teach ourselves not to believe in love-in fact we go as far as denying that love exists. It seems easier to just mess around, having a safe fling here and there than pass through the pain of a heart break again.
4. Peer pressure
In this age, romance is not a matter of the individual’s heart anymore. It’s a group affair. If your friends don’t put a sign of approval on the guy/chic, they don’t stand a chance. Love at first sight might get you a tight hug and her number but that’s as far as she will go without the approval of her friends. Friends scrutinize our partners more than we do. So we end up working harder to please a group of unknown people. Which begs the question, what happened to the days when chemistry was all it took for love to blossom.
5. We are just too lazy or too broke
We do the basics like texting, calling and making a visit but on the bare minimum-just enough to get us in and keep us there. Very few people wants to put in the time, money and the energy into making a relationship work. We relax after doing the ground work and we no longer go out of our way to make a big romantic gesture which might hook us in for real. Head over toes is turns into just another phrase in the movies and “we are just somehow together” describes our relationships.
